tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2375897711497565846.post7166205887708854804..comments2023-10-31T09:32:53.508+00:00Comments on New Beginnings.: Anxiety and Reassurance.Helenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16636162286931270812noreply@blogger.comBlogger6125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2375897711497565846.post-35232209652557835032009-09-27T00:06:42.127+01:002009-09-27T00:06:42.127+01:00Thank you SO much, both of you!!!
HorseOfCourse, ...Thank you SO much, both of you!!!<br /><br />HorseOfCourse, I agree completely. I try all the time to build up a big new store af positive associations with things as they are now, and it gets bigger everyday.<br /><br />I also try to avoid having too much time to think but peer into the drawer occasionally, very quickly, to see if I can handle it yet.<br /><br />You made me smile with that last sentence because that's just what my friend tells me all the time, using those very words.Helenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16636162286931270812noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2375897711497565846.post-87515985177412270532009-09-26T22:55:10.595+01:002009-09-26T22:55:10.595+01:00I suppose it would be overhuman not to be depresse...I suppose it would be overhuman not to be depressed, sad or anxious from time to time after what has happened, Helen.<br /><br />And sometimes getting time to think is not good.<br /><br />Maybe it is a bit like the story of the half full, or half empty, glass? <br />Where we have to keep working to put as much positive feelings and experiences into that glass, making sure it keeps staying half full (or full), to kind of balance up for the difficult things?<br /><br />If I experience something difficult, I kind of put it into a drawer. <br />Then I open the drawer just a tiny bit, once in a while, to glance at what's down there. <br />And when it is not so difficult anymore, I can open the drawer and look at it properly.<br /><br />Good luck Helen. You are doing fine.HorseOfCoursehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15907659164579327290noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2375897711497565846.post-76594863227178007672009-09-26T14:11:39.151+01:002009-09-26T14:11:39.151+01:00I've never felt that kind of anxiety, but, wit...I've never felt that kind of anxiety, but, with the little experience I have had with it, I can only imagine how dreadful a serious attack would be. <br /><br />I agree with everyone else about not being ashamed of your feelings. They are perfectly natural. It's only when those feelings begin to interfere with your ability to cope and live in the real world that it's a truly serious issue. From all you have been doing, I think you are coping well. You have accomplished some amazing things so far. I have a feeling as time goes on the bad feelings will disappear altogether. Just be patient with yourself.Jeanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10029423500476995817noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2375897711497565846.post-90259900953645205852009-09-26T13:23:47.278+01:002009-09-26T13:23:47.278+01:00Thank you both very much.
You sound very wise Ka...Thank you both very much. <br /><br />You sound very wise Kate and I think you are probably right but I'm a fighter. A quiet fighter but a fighter none the less. I have to fight against all the feelings that I don't want to have and try to find a way of changing them. It's just the best way for me to cope. I need to feel brave and proud of myself, and that I did everything I could to help myself.<br /><br />Muriel, I can see that would work but I am the opposite. I totally immerse myself in trying to help the horse overcome fear and being there for them. It's what my friend did for me. He couldn't think of what to say to help me so he was just there for me, a calm and reassuring presence, concentrating on trying to find things to do to help. He noticed every tiny detail and gave me his total attention, willing me on through it all. I KNEW that he cared and would do anything he could to help me, and even when I felt totally worthless and didn't really believe that anyone did care I could SEE that he did.<br /><br />That's what I give my horses - my total attention and commitment to be there for them, willing them through their fear, noticing and reinforcing every tiny effort they make to help themselves, because they have to decide that they want to, just as I did.Helenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16636162286931270812noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2375897711497565846.post-46116536714641699912009-09-26T08:12:32.412+01:002009-09-26T08:12:32.412+01:00Very good advise from Kate. Accept the feeling and...Very good advise from Kate. Accept the feeling and let it go. I did in the past depression, I had panic attack. So i understand very well your description. Again Kate's advise is the best.<br />Accepting even embracing (not fighting) then move on.<br /><br />I think you have already a good set up of coping strategies.<br /><br />You are amazing. <br /><br />For me I have found that I become too involved, I am highly emotional. But to calm down an agitated horse I first dettach myself from the world. I think of what I shall cook tonight, of what kind of home-work I shall do with my son, to dettach myself from the situation, then I come back to the present situation, but in a dettached cold manner, like if I was watching the scene from afar. It works everytime, I am calm and the horse will calm down.<br />I do not know if I make sense, but it helps me to calm down while working with an agitated horse ^-^Murielhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05491691754938320621noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2375897711497565846.post-26882370033508268592009-09-26T00:59:13.625+01:002009-09-26T00:59:13.625+01:00You should never feel ashamed of how you feel - it...You should never feel ashamed of how you feel - it's just how you feel, nothing more. Just let the feelings be what they are, then let them go. I think, as you say, this is just how we want our horses to deal with their anxieties and worries - it's OK for them to feel them, but we try to help them let them go and feel better inside.<br /><br />You've surrounded yourself with wonderful people, and of course the horses - always the horses. You're able to be open to what they are experiencing - this is a great gift.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com